Nevada City, CA, February 08, 2007 --(PR.com
)-- Jack and Tina McMann of Pasadena California are sick of it and they aren't going to take anymore. They've tried and tried and agreed they got nowhere.
Nowhere in the marriage therapy they've been in, that is. They went to four therapists in the last six years and approximate they spent over ten thousand dollars seeking marriage advice, and feel they got very little out of it.
Actually, their marriage has improved a lot, but they don't credit any of the marriage therapists they visited for the change.
"Even the so-called free help we got from our pastor wasn't of any use," Tina said. "Truth is, that confused us even more."
"It's not only the costs of the therapists," Jack chimed in. "It's all the time, energy, babysitters, and kind of starting all over again with each new marriage counselor. I got so sick of telling our stories once again, with no clear plan on where we were going in therapy."
"Jack had begun watching some of the TV marriage counselors and was quoting them around the house," Tina laughed.
Jack and Tina proclaimed they were "through with the experts," and decided to create their own plan for having a better marriage.
That's when their marriage really started to improve.
What they found out was what increasing numbers of people are discovering, which is that if they just took charge of their own marriage improvement plan, they could make changes they felt great about.
Renegade Marriage Counselor Dr. Max Vogt says he also has seen this trend toward self-direction in marriage improvement, which he views as extremely healthy and positive.
"When people become their own experts, they feel much more in charge, and much more likely to follow through," Dr. Max explained. "It's an excellent decision."
Dr. Max went on to suggest a couple of things that couples might consider in doing their own "marriage counseling program."
He said that it might help to take on one topic or area of the marriage at a time and work on that one, so as to avoid the overwhelm of trying to take on everything at once.
"Look at the areas that need work and make a list. For example, your finances, parenting, sex life, relationship with the in-laws -- these are some of the biggies. And then focus on making changes in one area at a time."
The biggest change most couples can do on their own, according to Dr. Max, is just to make a regular habit of sitting down and talking every day. "You'd be surprised how much change can happen if couples will just take the time, even 15 minutes, every day. And I'd suggest being very respectful of one another, really making a point of keeping a high level of respect."
Dr. Max Vogt is the author of "You Don't Have to Change Who You Are to Have a Great Marriage," (Morgan James, NY, 2007) which is a guidebook on doing your own marital counseling plan, being your own marriage advisor and making dramatic positive changes in your marriage. More info at www.MarriageBlueprint.com