“I-TO-WE” Article Causing Quite a Stir about Relationships
Emotionally Intelligent Relationships is the controversial concept for this article. It details the cause for most upsets in relationships. The 6 Steps to Conflict in Relationships explains the important factors that cause individuals not to be able to achieve successful communication and relationships.
Cohen is the founder of “I-TO-WE” Relationship Coaching, The “I-TO-WE” Institute and the author of the highly acclaimed book The Journey from “I-TO-WE.” Cohen says, "The theory behind this article has been the basis for how I coach people in conflict, explaining the realities concerning the root cause of their reoccurring upsets. I thought of the title recently during a session and it inspired me to write a paper to share with everyone."
Cohen says an Emotionally Intelligent Relationship is any ongoing relationship a person has with a partner, co-worker, boss, child, friend, or family member where successful communication is the norm. He says the reason some people do not have Emotionally Intelligent Relationships (EIR) can be summed up with one simple word – Reactivity.
Reactivity is the release of negative energy associated with emotional wounds and fears. People exhibit reactivity in two ways, outwardly or inwardly. In order for people to achieve an EIR, they must understand the 6 Steps to Conflict in Relationships, the reason for most reactivity in relationships.
He says that reactivity does not define who a person is. Unfortunately, because of the hurtful words, actions and behaviors associated with reactivity, it can begin to define the manner in which people perceive, respond to, and treat them.
Another unfortunate consequence of reactivity frequently occurs when individuals treat the reactive person in a manner that reaffirms their wounds and perpetuates their fear. It is similar to the Law of Attraction - people receive what they send out. If they project negative energy onto someone through emotional reactivity, it is likely they will be viewed and treated in ways that validate their fears, actions, and behaviors.
Cohen tells his clients that their reactivity is not who they are; rather it is how they cope. As wonderfully unique individuals, they have emotional wounds to heal and fears to conquer. The more they understand them, know how they cause reactivity, and make a plan to eliminate the negative behaviors, the quicker they will enjoy the amazing benefits of having Emotionally Intelligent Relationships.
You may read the article in its entirety at the i-to-we-relationship-coaching .com website.
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Christine Helms, Director of Communications